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I had to post this again. Seemed appropriate
Gotye- Somebody That I Used to Know (feat. Kimbra <3)
I guess that there are songs that say everything.Anyways, I wish to see Gotye, but only if he brings Kimbra as a guest to sing this song with him PLS ^^^^^^^^^
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This is non stop baby—
You’ve got me going crazy; you’re heavier than I knew..
At some point, Victor and I decided today would be a good day to continue watching Six Feet Under, while we stuffed our faces with fast food chicken hybrids from the McDonald’s menu. The morning was great, and the afternoon really was too. Honestly, everyday I spend with him is making it really hard on me to accumulate my rebel youth-end-off the wall systematic colera on to the world. I should be hating everything, it’s part of that loathing process that makes you a terrible human being; everyone goes through it. But not when we hang out. I hope, if he ever sees face to face with this, he won’t panic and change his opinions about me, [because that would make me feel incredibly stupid for writing something so nice when I’d be terribly mistaken]. ANYWAYS, so, as our bellies were imploding and our fingers greased up smelling like a 22 year old fry-cook and mayonaise (ew) we stayed in all day, watching S.F.U.
During this time, we were really just watching the series, all huddled up on his couch. Whenever I look back on when we started dating, I remember sitting down and trying to watch series/movies/ cable TV with him, and really never finishing anything. We get distracted easily. It’s a serious problem. Most of my memories with him have been sharing cuddle fuddle moments at his house [due to the fact that he fears my mother. I don’t blame him; he should.]. Today felt oddly special. He really is my partner in crime. I guess I’ve never felt un-lonely? I don’t know if anybody understands what I’m trying to say: One thing is to have company and someone that you can see and talk to, but still, you’ll come home feeling like you’ve splooshed your shoes and they will not dry. It’s a persistent feeling. The next day, they still won’t dry, and you’ll have to wear them again.. And sploosh away. But being un-lonely, well, there’s an idea.In my particular case, I’m a bit of an expert at pushing people away and semi hoarding onto their memories. I have rice pudding with codfish turnovers for brain, it’s only logical that I’d be the kind to be incapable of dealing with this. I’m a fraud and a dope. My relationships [being the ones they might be] are a bust. Every man I know, or loved, or even liked, give me this weird allergic reaction where my nipple feels like it’s burning with the flame of a thousand STDS. Each of the ones I’ve engaged an actual amorous development with, dwindle with ladies of the black skies posing blue [if you catch my drift]. I can’t blame them, I am insane. When dealing with me, no matter how many times I say nay, I always end up giving them another chance. And then I hate myself, making me fit right into the world by being the hateful artsy kid that lives in the suburbs and contemplates on suicide and problems of the contemporary world. WHAT. That ain’t right.
I mean no harm with what I say; all of these guys are nice guys, I’m just not made for them. Sometimes I wonder: Why does the window of opportunities trick you into launching right out of it, every once in a while, hoping that THAT person could be that unsplooshed pair of shoes you’ve always needed? It’s like a blackout. You suddenly forget who you are and how annoying you are by being along side them. Some people help the person that you are, and others literally vacuum the ounces of actual life/personality you posses. I don’t know exactly how this all comes in to coalition but I guess I’d rather note that than ignore it.
And today, I felt terrible for being the actual shitty human being I am. I turned over to him, we were laughing and flirting, when suddenly, I said to myself: “Hey, let’s pull on his leg a bit.” I told him that if we didn’t “cuddle intensely” a.k.a fornicate at Coachella 2012, I’d look for a lovely hippie girl who would. The debate started when he mentioned how he thought it was a very uncomfortable situation, doing such extra curricular activities during coachella. After I said that, along with tails of other cunt like comments, he got a little upset. He was laughing it off, as he said: “I’m offended.”
I didn’t mean it. I don’t mean those kind of comments, but according to my geekdroid lover he says those kind of comments are too suggestive and make him feel very uneasy. Everything, in less that a couple of minutes after that conversation, was back to normal. It’s not like we had an argument or anything of the sort. In my section of rice pudding with codfish turn overs, I added a wrench [just to keep it classy.]. In my head I was a jew in the 40’s ON THE RUN FROM MY FATE [please, nobody get offended.]. And then it hit me like a sharp end of an unexpected coffee table: I’m terrified.
Because I remembered what humid shoes felt like, and wow did that stink.
I think I needed to see it written before I knocked myself over once more before I hit the sack. I’m in love. I’m in deep [so deep]. God he makes me feel like I’m not such a bad person. As if I weren’t a complete nut job. We’re almost at season 4 from Six Feet Under, and we have this, very silly custom of not watching it individually [as in, we like to see it together]. It’s a bit of a tradition. This all being a bit of an unconscious thing, until I asked him “I wouldn’t want to watch it without you. Do you think it’s like our little thing to watch it together?”. He replied: “It wouldn’t be the same watching it alone. I mean if you want to continue the series without me, it’s alright— I’ve already seen it before. But I just like being with you.”. Oh please shoot me, I must sound ridiculous. Oh well.. Anyways I’m heading off to bed. Don’t worry, tumblerors and tumblerettes, I will not write in another year or so again; Don’t panic. I’ll do that for you.
Thank you, this has been another pointless writing. Goodnight.
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√ ^
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Gotye ft. Kimbra- Someone That I Used to Know.
This has got a real 80’s feel to it. Almost like I’m listening to Phil Collins (imokwiththis) -
Cameo Lover- Kimbra
I cannot stop listening to this song.
